Samantha Bee Quotes

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Samantha Bee

Bee in February 2011
Born (1969-10-25) October 25, 1969 (age 47)
Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Residence New York City, U.S.
Nationality Canadian
Citizenship Canada, United States[1]


Alma mater University of Ottawa
Years active 2003–present

Political/news satire
improvisational comedy
blue comedy
sketch comedy
surreal humor


American politics
Canadian politics
Canadian culture
political punditry
popular culture
current events
mass media/news media
civil rights
human sexuality


Joan Rivers
Lucille Ball
Steve Martin
Carol Burnett
David Letterman
Jon Stewart

Spouse Jason Jones (m. 2001)
Children 3

I think that my love of cooking grew out of my love of reading about cooking. When I was a kid, we had a bookcase in the kitchen filled with cookbooks. I would eat all my meals reading about meals I could have been having.
Samantha Bee
I continue to be very shy. I think a lot of actors and performers are really weird, shy people working it out onstage. I don't know why that is.
Samantha Bee
I think NASCAR's coming to Canada now so it'll take on a whole new relevance. Be afraid.
Samantha Bee
If I could live in New York the rest of my life, I absolutely would, but it's also prohibitively expensive and you have to be working. New York is a lot nicer when you have a job.
Samantha Bee
I never believe them when they say that because you really have to sort of be aware of what's going on in the news in order to get the jokes on the show.
Samantha Bee
You have to be willing to ask questions that almost no one else would ask.
I'm capable of living in the moment. And I'm especially capable of living in the moment of sitting on my sofa and watching other people's moments.
Samantha Bee
There are some people who believe that these are not real stories with real people, but they actually are.
Samantha Bee
It was only a few years ago that I couldn't get hired to save my life.
Don't judge me. I made a lot of money.
I think the show does better with newsmakers and politicians than it does with actors.
Samantha Bee
I don't think the show would be funny to you if you didn't already have a base of information.
Samantha Bee
My apartment is the equivalent of one room in my Toronto home. Now I understand why New Yorkers are on the streets at all hours. People don't want to stay inside for fear they'll go crazy.
Samantha Bee
I hate birthdays. I thought that I only hated my own birthday, and then I realized that I hate my children's birthdays too.
Samantha Bee
A lot of funny stuff happens in Canada.
I believe in breakfast. It's the one meal that my kids usually eat without a fuss, so that's huge. As for myself, I can't function without it, and I see it as a great way to get some healthy greens in, some coffee, and on a good day, maybe even some news of the world via the newspaper.
Samantha Bee
Last year people won more than one billion dollars playing poker. And casinos made twenty-seven billion just by being around those people.
Samantha Bee
I get maximum satisfaction out of buying children's clothes online.
The best part about poker is there's no down side.
It's great when you have people who will speak passionately and honestly about what they are doing.
Samantha Bee
It's not every day people fly you to New York for auditions.
I learn something in the interviews from time to time.
I am a cookbook fanatic.
If it wasn't for what goes on in the world of politics, we wouldn't really have much of a show.
Samantha Bee
I'm shy, but I'm not clinically shy. I don't have social anxiety disorder or anything like that. I more have a gentle shyness. Like, I have a little trouble mingling at parties.
Samantha Bee
I was totally unknown in the television and film industry in Canada.
It is so expensive to take care of my hair and keep it looking like I was born with it, when my real hair is the color of rat fur.
Samantha Bee