Quotes by: Fran Lebowitz

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Fran Lebowitz
Fran Lebowitz in 2011
Born Frances Ann Lebowitz
(1950-10-27) October 27, 1950 (age 66)
Morristown, New Jersey, United States
Occupation Author, writer, public speaker
Nationality American
Notable works Metropolitan Life
Social Studies
The Fran Lebowitz Reader

Nature is by and large to be found out of doors, a location where, it cannot be argued, there are never enough comfortable chairs.
Fran Lebowitz
I've done the calculation and your chances of winning the lottery are identical whether you play or not.
Fran Lebowitz
Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, and small people talk about wine.
Fran Lebowitz
Vegetables are interesting but lack a sense of purpose when unaccompanied by a good cut of meat.
Fran Lebowitz
To put it rather bluntly, I am not the type who wants to go back to the land; I am the type who wants to go back to the hotel.
Fran Lebowitz
If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater suggest that he wear a tail.
Fran Lebowitz
If you are of the opinion that the contemplation of suicide is sufficient evidence of a poetic nature, do not forget that actions speak louder than words.
Fran Lebowitz
Romantic love is mental illness. But it's a pleasurable one. It's a drug. It distorts reality, and that's the point of it. It would be impossible to fall in love with someone that you really saw.
Fran Lebowitz
I place a high moral value on the way people behave. I find it repellent to have a lot, and to behave with anything other than courtesy in the old sense of the word - politeness of the heart, a gentleness of the spirit.
Fran Lebowitz
Contrary to popular opinion, the hustle is not a new dance step - it is an old business procedure.
Fran Lebowitz
Never relinquish clothing to a hotel valet without first specifically telling him that you want it back.
Fran Lebowitz
You can't go around hoping that most people have sterling moral characters. The most you can hope for is that people will pretend that they do.
Fran Lebowitz
Being a woman is of special interest only to aspiring male transsexuals. To actual women, it is simply a good excuse not to play football.
Fran Lebowitz
All God's children are not beautiful. Most of God's children are, in fact, barely presentable.
Fran Lebowitz
Radio news is bearable. This is due to the fact that while the news is being broadcast, the disk jockey is not allowed to talk.
Fran Lebowitz
Children are the most desirable opponents at scrabble as they are both easy to beat and fun to cheat.
Fran Lebowitz
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