Quotes by: Fred Allen

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It is probably not love that makes the world go around, but rather those mutually supportive alliances through which partners recognize their dependence on each other for the achievement of shared and private goals.
Fred Allen
A committee is a group of the unprepared, appointed by the unwilling to do the unnecessary.
Fred Allen
I always have trouble remembering three things: faces, names, and - I can't remember what the third thing is.
Fred Allen
We are living in the machine age. For the first time in history the comedian has been compelled to supply himself with jokes and comedy material to compete with the machine. Whether he knows it or not, the comedian is on a treadmill to oblivion.
Fred Allen
An associate producer is the only guy in Hollywood who will associate with a producer.
Fred Allen
Her hat is a creation that will never go out of style; it will just look ridiculous year after year.
Fred Allen
An actor's popularity is fleeting. His success has the life expectancy of a small boy who is about to look into a gas tank with a lighted match.
Fred Allen
I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.
Fred Allen
You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood, place it in the navel of a fruit fly and still have room enough for three caraway seeds and a producer's heart.
Fred Allen
Committee - a group of men who individually can do nothing but as a group decide that nothing can be done.
Fred Allen
Washington is no place for a good actor. The competition from bad actors is too great.
Fred Allen
I have just returned from Boston. It is the only thing to do if you find yourself up there.
Fred Allen
I'd rather have a full bottle in front of me than a full frontal lobotomy.
Fred Allen
A committee is a group of people who individually can do nothing, but who, as a group, can meet and decide that nothing can be done.
Fred Allen
Most of us spend the first six days of each week sowing wild oats; then we go to church on Sunday and pray for a crop failure.
Fred Allen
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