Quotes by: Garry Shandling
Shandling at the Night of Comedy 9 benefit in Beverly Hills, California on April 30, 2011
||Garry Emmanuel Shandling
November 29, 1949|
Chicago, Illinois, U.S.
||March 24, 2016
Los Angeles, California, U.S.
||Stand-up, television, film
||University of Arizona
||Observational comedy, satire, cringe comedy
||Self-deprecation, human interaction, everyday life
||Woody Allen, Johnny Carson
||Ricky Gervais, Judd Apatow, Jon Stewart, Louis C.K.
I don't know why men are so fascinated with television and I think it has something to do with - if I may judge from my own father, who used to sit and stare at the TV while my mother was speaking to him - I think that's a man's way of tuning out.
I like to talk on the cell when I do interviews. That way, I double my chances of getting brain cancer: from the cell phone, and from the questions.
But I really like hosting, I think it's a strength of mine. It allows me to improvise, and I love the spontaneity of that, and I think I'm funny behind the desk when interviewing someone.
The only way I would go back to hosting would be if it were something entirely new. It would prevent me from wanting to host a standard-fare kind of talk show.
I started boxing for exercise, and on the very first day, the trainer got in the ring with me and said, 'Whoever controls the breathing in the ring controls the fight.' I immediately passed out.
I guess he wanted to see a little more sexual activity because in real life, in bed I think less is more and let the woman come to me. Frankly, I don't even need a woman there.
First of all, I'm not the kind of guy that likes to rehash the show and so forth and so on.
I don't think I'm severely politically active. I care deeply, and I have my strong personal beliefs. I think America is dancing on thin ice. But I think it's bigger even than a political issue. I wonder about the evolution of the human race and spirit and what our goals and reasons for living are.
I keep my scrapbooks in the car. When I come to a stoplight, I start looking through my past. Sometimes I wish the red lights were longer.
I had no idea who I was when I started. I was frightened to death and had no natural performing skills.
Because I am afraid of commitment. This movie certainly has some bearing and is some reflection of my real feeling about relationships, because I do have commitment issues. My friends tell me I have intimacy problems, but they don't know me, so who cares what they think?
Nice guys finish first. If you don't know that, then you don't know where the finish line is.
Men who betray women also betray other men. Women shouldn't feel so special.
I am pretty tenacious as a perfectionist in terms of getting something right.
It's not the hair on your head that matters. It's the kind of hair you have inside.
Dogs are not people. Be leery of any woman who refers to her dogs as her 'kids,' because you'll only end up paying for their schooling.
It takes me so long to get tired of a man. It's women that are the problem. Don't get me wrong. I think men have their problems just as much as women.