Quotes by: W. C. Fields

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W. C. Fields
W. C. Fields, 1938
Born William Claude Dukenfield
(1880-01-29)January 29, 1880
Darby, Pennsylvania, U.S.
Died December 25, 1946(1946-12-25) (aged 66)
Pasadena, California, U.S.
Cause of death Stomach hemorrhage
Resting place Forest Lawn Memorial Park, Glendale, California
Other names Charles Bogle
Otis Criblecoblis
Mahatma Kane Jeeves
"Uncle Claude"
Occupation Actor, comedian, juggler, writer
Years active 1898–1946
Spouse(s) Harriet Hughes (m. 1900–46) (his death) 1 child
Partner(s) Bessie Poole (girlfriend) 1 child
Carlotta Monti (girlfriend)
Children William Claude Fields, Jr.
William Morris

Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people.
W. C. Fields
I like to keep a bottle of stimulant handy in case I see a snake, which I also keep handy.
W. C. Fields
There comes a time in the affairs of man when he must take the bull by the tail and face the situation.
W. C. Fields
It was a woman who drove me to drink, and I never had the courtesy to thank her for it.
W. C. Fields
The world is getting to be such a dangerous place, a man is lucky to get out of it alive.
W. C. Fields
Remember, a dead fish can float downstream, but it takes a live one to swim upstream.
W. C. Fields
I never worry about being driven to drink; I just worry about being driven home.
W. C. Fields
Some things are better than sex, and some are worse, but there's nothing exactly like it.
W. C. Fields
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