Quotes on humor

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For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him will believeth in anything. - Hitchens 3:16
Christopher Hitchens
The Lord prefers common-looking people. That is why he made so many of them.
Abraham Lincoln
I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?
George Carlin
Here’s to freedom, cheers to art. Here’s to having an excellent adventure and may the stopping never start.
Jason Mraz
I feel about Photoshop the way some people feel about abortion. It is appalling and a tragic reflection on the moral decay of our society…unless I need it, in which case, everybody be cool.
Tina Fey
They heard the click of the mail slot and flop of letters on the doormat.
"Get the mail, Dudley," said Uncle Vernon from behind his paper.
"Make Harry get it."
"Get the mail, Harry."
"Make Dudley get it."
"Poke him with your Smelting stick, Dudley.
J.K. Rowling
...crackers..." a voice breathed out nehind us, "yesss..."
Both of us turned, watching as Chubs twisted around in his seat and settled back down, still fast asleep.
I pressed a hand over my mouth to keep from laughing. Liam rolled his eyes, smiling.
"He dreams about food," he said. "A lot.
Alexandra Bracken
Every year, many, many stupid people graduate from college. And if they can do it, so can you.
John Green
A successful book is not made of what is in it, but what is left out of it.
Mark Twain
Our love was a two-person game. At least until one of us died, and the other became a murderer.

Dark Jar Tin Zoo
I’m a fake fact factory. The things I make are the things I make up. Also, as a side business, I make love. Actually, I just made that up.
Dora J. Arod
Even on the most solemn occasions I got away without wearing socks and hid that lack of civilization in high boots
Albert Einstein
If after reading this book you come to my home and brutally murder me, I do not blame you.
Jesse Andrews
The nice part about being a pessimist is that you are constantly being either proven right or pleasantly surprised.
George F. Will
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When you blame others you give up your power to change. Take responsibility for your future!

– Chris Voss

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