Quotes on humor

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And besides . . . I don’t want to leave you. Er, you guys.”

He smiled, and it lit up his whole face. “Well, ‘we’ are certainly happy to hear that. Oh, and I’m also happy to watch our darling little love child dragon while you’re in St. Louis.”

I grinned back.
Richelle Mead
You mean other than the wings? I once ate nine snicker bars in a row without barfing. It was a record.
James Patterson
Democracy is a pathetic belief in the collective wisdom of individual ignorance. No one in this world, so far as I know—and I have researched the records for years, and employed agents to help me—has ever lost money by underestimating the intelligence of the great masses of the plain people. Nor has anyone ever lost public office thereby.
H.L. Mencken
Kids. You gotta love them. I adore children. A little salt, a squeeze of lemon--perfect.
Jim Butcher
He was painfully shy, which, as is often the manner of the painfully shy, he overcompensated for by being too loud at the wrong times.
Neil Gaiman
His eyes widened just a bit, his lips flexed. I realized he was trying not to laugh. I hate it when people find my threats amusing.
Laurell K. Hamilton
I swear, talking to you is like talking to a really good-looking and mildly stupid brick wall.
Derek Landy
The magician stood erect, menacing the attackers with demons, metamorphoses, paralyzing ailments, and secret judo holds. Molly picked up a rock.
Peter S. Beagle
All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusion is called a philosopher.
Ambrose Bierce
To succeed in life, you need three things: a wishbone, a backbone and a funnybone.
Reba McEntire
No adolescent ever wants to be understood, which is why they complain about being misunderstood all the time.
Stephen Fry
I guess the sacrifice of my dignity is the only thing that will save us now. The things I endure for love. The Fates laugh at my torment.
Julie Kagawa
Explanations exist; they have existed for all time; there is always a well-known solution to every human problem—neat, plausible, and wrong.
H.L. Mencken
rolf! what? are you really rolling on the floor laughing? well, please stay down there for a sec while I KICK YOUR ASS.
David Levithan
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– Chris Voss

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